I was having a bad week last week mentally. So much has happened and I just couldn't stop myself from panicking. The result was a total meltdown! My motivation just left me, I had that "what's the point" voice nagging me and I gave in. I have spent the week sitting around,hardly talking and just doing nothing. I thought cleaning may help... It did a little I felt better having a clear bedroom and felt proud I had achieved that dispite a voice telling me it's pointless as I'll give up halfway through. My diet would have originally been the first thing to go but hubby has been really pushing me he isn't bring home cream cakes daily and is not letting me skip meals.
We are off to Mexico next year. Hubby was chosen as a winner for a family holiday and while I am excited, I am also terrified. I am going to sweat my backside off! The thought of even getting on a plane at this size terrifes me more though. I have visions of the plan tipping to one side like they do on the cartoons. I know it won't happen of course and know once there, I will enjoy every second of it and even though it's worring me, it's a good thing right? The fact that I am worrying must mean that I know there is a problem, It just makes me want it so much more!
My usual nurse was not available this week so it was a quick weigh in and a quick chat. Nothing much has changed really. She does not want to mess with my routine too much as she does not see me every week. I did however lose 2 & 1/2 lbs something that I am extremely proud of.
I actually can not wait till next week now. I am excited and fully motivated. Hubby has kicked me out of my funk and for the first time in my whole life I feel like I have some personal support. Here's to next week :)